Cut the crap....
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 "Suckers have no business with money anyway."

Current Ranking: 3rd

Poker accomplishments/wins:  Won the £5 re-buy tourny at the Gutshot (okay, okay, shared first)

Plays online at: PokerStars

Online Aliases: SlaineMcRoth

Playing style: No idea, I surprise myself every day I play 

Most Likely To: actually have the cards 

Least Likely to: actually have that Royal Flush

Worst 'bad beat': Any beat is a bad beat.

When not playing poker I'm: playing computer games, golf or reading

Favourite poker pro: Doyle Brunson

Favourite/Lucky Openers: Aside from my deuces, it depends on the night

Favourite quote/saying: "That's a bargain!"

Favourite film: I can give you a list of my top 100....

Favourite website: 

Anything else (if you must):  

Order: Is each here? Does each have his opposite?
Chaos: I am here, but my opposite is you.
Order: Huh?
Evil: Don't let him bug ya'. We're here.
Truth: My opposite is not here.
Good: Is your opposite 'Lies'?
Truth: My opposite is 'Void'. He couldn't make it.
Evil: : (snicker) Figures!
Order: Agh! How are we going to seat five! This table is made for six!
Evil: Just take out his chair and move over. Sheesh!
Good: I have the cards.
Evil: I've got the chips.
Truth: I have the beer.
Chaos: I have the cards!
Order: Shut up.

Order: Whose deal is it?
Evil: Do ya' gotta ask that EVERY time?
Truth: It is Good's deal.
Good: OK, five card draw...uh, everything is wild.
Evil: How can anyone win if everything is wild?
Good: No ONE can win, but we all can call ourselves winners if...
Order: I like this game.
Evil: This is pointless.
Truth: It is time to deal.
Good: Here we go! Your bet, Truth.
Truth: Five.
Order: Five and raise you five.
Evil: Don't you morons get it? It doesn't matter how much you bet!
Order: I like ten better.
Evil: : (sigh) Call.
Chaos: I fold.
Chaos: I still fold.
Good: OK, I'll call. How many, Truth?
Evil: What's the point in taking more cards?
Truth: I will keep the cards I have.
Order: I will take two.
Evil: Why?!?
Order: I didn't like those.
Evil: None for me.
Chaos: I'll take six.
Good: Sorry, you folded. Dealer keeps his. Bets?
Evil: Oh, just get this over with.
Order: But now we have to bet!
Evil: Any money you put in, you're just gonna get back!
Truth: I am in agreement with Evil. Let us show our cards.
Truth: I have five aces.
Order: I have five ace of spades.
Chaos: I have a three.
Good: Please be quiet. I also have five aces. We all win.
Evil: Hold it, bub. Six aces, read'em and weep.
Good: Where did you get that card?
Truth: He stole it from Chaos.
Evil: You know the rules, boys. The pot's mine.
Good: That was a stupid game.
Order: Whose deal is it?
Truth: The dealer progression is opposite the deal. Chaos deals.
Chaos: Whee!
all but Chaos: (groan)
Chaos: Eleven card stud-hold'em with threes, eights, jacks, and kings wild...fives count as fours, fours count as nines, and queens don't count unless there is a prime numbered spade showing...
Order: I fold...

                         - "Behold the power of the Beer Hand!" -