"Online poker is rigged."
"I have a monster in my pocket..."
Every hour, every day of the year someone playing online poker gets his Quad Aces cracked by a Royal Flush?
If it keeps happening he might actually leave Pokerstars altogether!
Many of our members live or have recently moved overseas (no doubt to escape their numerous creditors) or they simply aren't able to make it to as many live games as others. We miss them, so we thought it would be a nice idea to hold a weekly online tournament so that they can continue to kick our arses from a distance. So as of March 2005 7-2offsuit will host a private freezeout on Pokerstars which is open to ALL members of the group.
In keeping with our ethos of keeping everything friendly and affordable the buy-in for 7-2offsuit Online is about the same as a pint of lager (in a tall glass) up West. If you're a member of a Working Men's Club in the North of England that's more or less equivalent to six pints of bitter and a couple of dozen packets of crisps, but you get the idea.
Where: Pokerstars. Look under the Tourney section and then the Private tab and you should see us listed there under '7-2offsuit Online'. We sat up all night thinking that name up I can tell you. Got to keep it nice and simple for those reading this with their index fingers (and mouthing the words...)
When: Every Thursday night at 20:00hrs GMT (15:00hrs ET)
Who: Only registered members of 7-2offsuit, and anyone else who has been enterprising enough to discover the top secret password*. The tourney is restricted to a maximum 200 runners. Like that's ever going to be a problem.
Game Format: No Limit Texas Holdem (unless we're feeling frisky).
Tournament will always be a freezeout (no re-buy/no add-on)
Buy-in: $10 + $1 for 1500 tournament chips.
One player performing a 'hit-and-run' and never showing his face again would somewhat distort the League Table, so in order to qualify for inclusion a player MUST have attended a minimum number of games. The number of games required is shown below, and will increase over time.
- 31-40 tourneys - player must have attended a minimum of 5 games
- 41-50 tourneys - player must have attended a minimum of 6 games
- 51-60 tourneys - player must have attended a minimum of 7 games
And so on, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad absurdum et cetera et cetera...
|Rank|| Player ID||Played||Won||ITM||Lost||ITM|
| 1st||Birdi Numnum|| 5|| 1|| 2|| 2|| 60|| 50||108|| 58||+116.0|
| 2nd||murphyz|| 10|| 4|| 2|| 4|| 60||100||203|| 103||+103.0|
| 3rd||lee.willi|| 9|| 3|| 1|| 5|| 44|| 90||173|| 83||+ 92.2|
| 4th||Abeyance|| 15|| 2|| 6|| 7|| 53||150||273|| 123||+ 82.0|
| 5th||-- DXL -- || 8|| 0|| 5|| 3|| 63|| 80||138|| 58||+ 72.5|
| 6th||TheWM|| 15|| 3|| 3|| 9|| 40||150||251|| 101||+ 67.3|
| 7th||Ante Edna|| 30|| 1|| 13|| 16|| 47||300||399|| 99||+ 33.0|
| 8th||GayStax|| 9|| 1|| 2|| 6|| 33|| 90||117|| 27||+ 30.0|
| 9th||OakeyCokey|| 11|| 2|| 1|| 8|| 27||110||135|| 25||+ 22.7|
| 10th||zerokoo1|| 13|| 1|| 4|| 8|| 38||130||153|| 23||+ 17.7|
The rankings shown above are based on Return on Investment, not Net Profit. Where R.O.I. is identical, rankings are in alphabetical order. In the event of any dispute, I am right and you are wrong, so please don't bombard me with emails. Ta everso..
Ah, the anonymity of poker on the internet. A place where you are free to galumph and gambol from table to table openly criticising the wantonly godawful plays of your contemporaries secure in the knowledge that they don't know you who you are, how well you play or, perhaps more importantly, where you live. No more! Uncovered here for the first time and in no particular order the Pokerstars alter-egos of the motley assortment of poker deadbeats that make up 7-2offsuit. OK, OK, its alphabetical.
|'STARS ID|| ||Who they are in In Real Life|
|Ante Edna||John D|
|-- DXL --||Dave W|
|Origami Boy||Dave P|
|The Big Ig ||Ed U|
|Thomas Elvis||Cathy D |
You can download and view the full League Table in all its multi-coloured splendour by logging into the friday-night-poker Yahoo! group and going into the files section (only accessible by group members). Ain't we secretive?
Freezeouts played: 35
Total paid out to date: $3510
Total number of players on current league table: 52
* TIP - it's someone's nickname...
- "Behold the power of the Beer Hand!" -